put on a happy face.

sometimes i feel like i'm faking my way through life.

i don't do things for me. i do them for other people. to make them happy. it's very...unsatisfying. i don't want to live my life like this. but i can't seem to find a way out of it. i actually tried to once. my efforts were squashed. denied. like i didn't even have a choice in the matter. IT'S MY DECISION. so how did i get bullied into overlooking it? because i can't say no. i can't make people unhappy. so i'm stuck in a swirling vortex of doom. "keep your eyes down and do what your told"

i'm talking, shouting, screaming, but not a soul is listening.

i'm stuck.